What are the Strengths of Good Leaders?

How Many Strengths of Good Leaders Do You Possess?

Leadership is a unique ability to inspire others to participate in a team to accomplish something. The strengths of good leaders are quite distinct from management skills. 

Managers optimize things like machines, budgets, assets, etc. People must be treated differently from “things.”

Read on to learn what defines a leader.

A photo of 3 people having a meeting showing the Strengths of Good Leaders

7 Qualities Exhibited by Effective Leaders

Here are the most important strengths of good leaders that set them apart from managers. Several of these skills are often called “soft skills.” The tools managers use in handling inanimate business aspects aren’t very effective with people. And similarly, some of these soft skills would be less effective with things. That said, you’ll see that some managerial skills are important in leadership.

  1. Top on my list is INTEGRITY – Say what you’ll do, and do what you say. In this category, I include authenticity since these two concepts go hand in hand. It’s impossible to be integrous unless you’re rooted in who you are. 
  2. LOYALTY to the team and the organization, as well as its customers. You can expect loyalty from your team only when you exhibit loyalty to each team member. Since the team supports organizational objectives, loyalty to those objectives is also vital. A leader must be enthusiastic about the mission of the team and the organization. Loyalty to customers and other interested parties is also important to doing business.
  3. COMMUNICATION skills – The ability to communicate verbally and in writing is vital when working with people. Exchanging ideas is a big part of teamwork. That can be accomplished only when people communicate with each other.
  4. EMPOWERMENT – People do their best work when they feel that they own the results of their production. They want to know how it contributes to a larger mission. When these incentives are in place, they have genuine pride in their work. Leaders must give team members ownership of their tasks for this to happen. A “leader” who micromanages, or worse, does a team member’s work for them takes away that ownership.
  5. DECISIVENESS – An often-repeated rule of thumb is to make decisions quickly and change them slowly. When you have the facts you need, don’t delay – decide! Your first decision is usually on the mark, so be reluctant to change it. If new facts turn up, examine them carefully and change the decision only when you’re sure you must.
  6. MANAGERIAL COMPETENCE – I set out differentiating leaders from managers. Nonetheless, leaders must be able to manage the tasks, budgets and schedules the team works with. Managerial competence, as well as people skills, is required. 
  7. CHARISMA – Charisma might be the “softest” and hardest to define of these qualities. It’s essential to every other quality on the list. Charisma draws others in and causes them to enjoy working with you.

Why Do You Need These Certain Strengths to be a Good Leader?

These strengths are the keys to inspiring others to do something.

A leader can often be someone who has these strengths and has not been designated as a leader. Leading from within doesn’t require a title. You can be a leader from wherever you sit on the team.

One with the title of leader or manager, or even president, is not a leader if he or she doesn’t possess all or most of these traits. Most of us have probably worked somewhere where this principle had its effect. I certainly have, several times.

Unfortunately, there are many workplaces where the designated leader is a micromanager or an outright tyrant. The least effective workers may hang around for a while, mostly out of fear or self-limiting beliefs. The real producers usually move on.

In this very brief newsletter I wrote 3+ years ago I referred to a company where leaders become leaders by attracting “follwership”. The company’s management assigns no leadership positions. Seems to me like a very workable arrangement. It works for them!

Why is leadership an important skill?

Believe it or not, most people like to be productive. Leadership is what brings productive people together in teams and inspires them to produce. Leaders also choose the tasks needed in the bigger organizational picture. Team members must all be doing work that contributes to this bigger picture. 

A well-organized team can produce several times what the sum of all the members’ efforts would be if each worked alone. 1+1+1+1+1=10 or more on a productive team. The leader is the team member who inspires and supports the team’s work.

Googling ”lëadership” or searching for it on our blog page will turn up a wealth of advice and ideas on leadership qualities. Others may emphasize different items on this list or mention others. The qualities I’ve discussed here will surely turn up in any leadership discussion.

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Week!

Eric Lofholm, my friend, mentor and sales coach, hosts a 15-minute motivational call every business day. (For a short time, he switched to doing the call weekly, and it seems nobody liked it.)  The call is at 7:45 AM Pacific time. Register for it here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or on a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

Leadership is an important coaching topic, and vital to doing good business. Want to add your thoughts on leadership? Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Do You Know Someone Who’d Like This?

You’re welcome to forward it to them with the FORWARD feature in your email program. 

Did someone forward this to you? Would you like to subscribe (free)? Send me your email address and tell me you’d like to subscribe.

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you go to a networking event. You’re amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform gives you this kind of exposure to your market. These are the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value. We get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market.

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to remove clients’ pain.)

  • LinkedIn has 740 million members. We find the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people by yourself, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again!
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Technology Builds A Fire Under Teamwork

Technology Helps Teamwork Produce

Teamwork can supercharge productivity, when the team has the right tools and technology to work with.

Here’s a guy who found the existing tools inadequate. So he built his own, made it adaptable to other businesses, and sells it to them. Good teamwork requires good tools. Be sure to give them the right ones!

Read on for the whole story.

A group of worker with teamwork that uses technology and tools to build a house

Teamwork Requires Tools to Produce Results

How productive would the team in the picture be if they had no hammers, saws, drills or screwdrivers? Skills and ability are, of course, important. Only with the right tools though can the skills and ability be effectively applied. 

Teams can do more than the sum of what the individual members could do working solo…IF they have appropriate tools for the task at hand.

Collaboration is Vital in Business

Peter Coppinger is the CEO of a company aptly named Teamwork, He tells the story of how he came to realize they needed to develop a teamwork tool.

In a complex business environment, nobody has all the answers. Collaboration with others inside and outside the company is vital to obtaining optimum results. Here’s a reading recommendation that elaborates on this concept. Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan wrote Who not How. They explain that striving to learn HOW to do things can limit your productivity when there’s a WHO to do it more expertly. Hire the WHO and concentrate on your areas of expertise.

The members of a team must communicate with each other to do their work effectively.

On a worksite like the one in the picture, communication is face-to-face.

In a business environment, team members may be separated by thousands of miles. 

Technology Assists Collaboration

As Peter’s company grew, teams expanded internationally. They found that a real-time document management system was needed to keep everyone up to date.

They sampled all the software available and found the one that showed the most promise. Even it turned out to be hard and confusing to use. When it’s hard and confusing to use something, people tend not to use it. That results in people not being “in the loop” on important information.

New Solution Required!

Teamwork learned that other companies were experiencing similar frustration with the available technology. So, they saw a business opportunity. They developed a clearly defined set of requirements for Teamwork Spaces. Once they had that they turned the project over to an Irish development team to build it.

Coppinger was initially reluctant to let the work out of his own shop. However, he realized that collaboration is at the center of everything the company does. So farming out the development of the technology was the right thing to do. They made sure that the app developed by the Irish team was easy to use for people at all levels in the company, and for outside collaborators.

With their old system, people didn’t always keep up with information they needed to know. Sometimes management couldn’t actually tell who was up to date on that information. So they put the Required Reading feature front and center on the new dashboard.

Teamwork, living up to their name, is all about helping every team member contribute to the work they’re responsible for. When they found nothing on the market to make that happen, they built it! Sometimes you need to make your own tools. If you can sell them to others, so much the better!

A few key points from the article:

  • Teamwork is key to productivity.
  • Teams need tools (in this case, technology) to maximize their productivity.
  • When the right technology is not available, build it!
  • If others are suffering the same woes, sell the technology to them!

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Week!

Eric Lofholm is my friend, mentor and sales coach. He hosts a 30-minute motivational call every Thursday (recently changed from daily).  The call is at 7:30 AM Pacific time. Register for it here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or in a recording you can access on your time. 

Let’s Talk!

How’s the teamwork in your organization? Do the teams have the tools they need? Want to talk about it? Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat by Zoom on the 

phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Get too Much Email?

Today’s issue is going to all my subscribers. If you’re among my monthly subscribers, you’ll receive your next issue on October 4, 2021.

If the monthly schedule suits you better, just reply to this message with the word “MONTHLY” in the message or subject line. If you elect that option, you can still check out the weekly issues at your convenience here. Since your last monthly issue, we’ve discussed:

Collapse of Christianity? – Published 30 August 2021

Cannabis is Here to StayPublished 24 August 2021

Make Your Brain Younger!Published 16 August 2021

Find New |Joy in Relationships – Published 9 August 2021

 

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you go to a networking event. You’re amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform gives you this kind of exposure to your market. These are the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value. We get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market.

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to remove clients’ pain.)

  • LinkedIn has 740 million members. We find the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people by yourself, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again!
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Blog Like This One?

Want new ways to engage your prospects and clients? Unity Copywriting writes the materials that help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

Making Your Brain Younger!

Think the brain damage from a serious drug addiction is permanent? 

Here’s a guy who not only kicked the addiction. He became a neuroscientist. He has some valuable advice for us to help us improve our brain health, as he did.

https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1559757148-5c350d0d3c56?ixid=MnwxMjA3fDB8MHxzZWFyY2h8OXx8YnJhaW4lMjBhZ2UlMjBpbmRpY2F0b3JzfGVufDB8fDB8fA%3D%3D&ixlib=rb-1.2.1&auto=format&fit=crop&w=500&q=60

Brian Pennie kicked a heroin addiction and made his brain 10 years younger!

From Age 20 to age 35, Brian was consumed with a heroin addiction. His brain had developed into an anxiety machine. He points out that whatever we focus our minds on shapes our brains.

In October 2013, he experienced a horrible night and woke up to the fact that his brain could be re-shaped in a direction he chose. He doesn’t describe the “horrible night” in detail.

At that time he connected with the Whelan Lab at Trinity College Institute of Neuroscience in Dublin, Ireland. They calculate brain-predicted age (brainPAD scores) by analyzing the grey matter density of the brain. Brian’s article has some convincing images illustrating this.

From 2013, when he stopped using hard drugs, to 2018, Brian’s predicted brain age decreased to where it was 10 years below his chronological age. Brain age is a predictor of mortality risk, cognitive decline, increased risk of dementia, and quality of physical function.

How did he do this? Therein lies our story.

12 practices Brian used to reshape his brain and its focus:

  • Self-observation is a form of meditation that allows us to thoughtfully observe our thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations without engaging with them. An example could be a lump in your throat or a tight chest. If you see these sensations as clouds in the sky that you observe from the blue sky around the clouds, you observe them without engaging. 

Brian reports that he still has anxiety feelings. Yet he’s able to observe them without engaging, through self-observation.

  • Seek questions, rather than answers; Brian has a list of 7 questions he asks himself in challenging situations:
  1. What part of this situation is under my control?
  2. What am I constantly avoiding? 
  3. What would my mentors think about this? 
  4. What would tomorrow-me think? 
  5. If I am saying yes to this, what am I saying no to?.
  6. Does this align with my values? 
  7. What’s the worst that’ll happen if I attempt this? 

He says these questions help him sort out his life when he feels stuck.

  • Remove (or reduce) “emotional hijackings”. Daniel Goleman defines these as the situation where your amygdala – the fear center of your brain – screams like a siren.
  • Focus on the present moment.
  • Tighten up sleep routines. He has several specific recommendations in this area.
  • Limit alcohol consumption.
  • Feed your brain with good quality brain food. Become a student of life and develop a growth mindset.
  • Use challenges as fuel for growth.
  • Lean toward your fears.
  • Life it up – bring joy, energy, and present moment awareness into encounters with others.
  • Listen to your heart.
  • Write a new story.

Some things he learned to avoid:

  • Difficult people.
  • Negative news.
  • Social media.

Brian discusses several of these points in significant detail. I recommend you read his article to get the full benefit;

Brian’s Takeaway from His Experience

What we repeatedly do defines our lives. These habitual behaviors determine how we think and feel, as well as affecting our outside world. Neuroscience shows these actions also change the shape of our brains.

When we bring positive habits into our lives, we change the age of our brains. We live longer, reduce the risk of dementia and cognitive decline, and we have superior physical function over those with an “older brain.”

When we change our habits, we change our brains. When we change our brains, we change our lives.

What would you do if you had a second chance at life? Having escaped from the depths of heroin addiction, Brian decided to design a program to show people how he did it. His FREE program is available here.

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Week!

Eric Lofholm is my friend, mentor and sales coach. He hosts a 30-minute motivational call every Thursday (recently changed from daily).  The call is at 7:30 AM Pacific time. Register for it here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or later in a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

Want to talk about Brian Pennie’s experience and what it might mean for you or someone in your life? Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Do You Know Someone Who’d Like This?

Forward it to them with the FORWARD feature in your email program. 

Did someone forward this to you? Would you like to subscribe (free)? Send me your email address and tell me you’d like to subscribe.

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you go to a networking event. You’re amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform gives you this kind of exposure to your market. These are the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value. We get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market.

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to remove clients’ pain.)

  • LinkedIn has 740 million members. We find the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people by yourself, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again!
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Newsletter Like This One?

Want new ways to engage your prospects and clients? Unity Copywriting writes the materials that help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

Find New Joy in Relationships!

In this issue, we return to one of my favorite themes…

Relationships.

Why do I keep doing that? I believe relationships define our lives. There is no more important ingredient in life than joy in relationships.

Here are some ideas for improving this important aspect of your life.

Sean Kernan describes three key ways of improving your relationships.

Lunchtime at the clubhouse in the development where I live affords great people-watching opportunities. A friend and I often have lunch together a few times a week.

One of our regular observations is the rudeness we see at tables of several people. These people apparently choose to be in each other’s company. Yet they spend a majority of their time together paying no attention to each other as they poke away at their electronic devices. 

To me, this says, “I’d rather chat with my friend across town than converse with you, sitting next to me.” If that really is your preference, why not depart the group you’re in and go spend the time with the other friend?

Want to improve your relationships? Here’s a fertile opportunity. Turn off the notifications on your phone, put it in your pocket or purse, and pay rapt attention to the people you’re in physical company with. Save the electronic chatting for later.

As Sean points out we send a steady stream of signals to those around us. If we think carefully about the signals we send, and send better ones, the quality of our relationships will improve.

To me, the cell phone offenses I described are the most common and the most blatant indicators of disrespect.

With that said, here are some other ways you can show respect for those around you. These are the ones Sean focuses on; I’ll bet you and I could sit down for 15 minutes and easily add 100/+ items to the list.

  • Be present! Stand or sit up straight, look the other person in the eye, and pay attention to what they’re saying. Then respond thoughtfully. This says, “I honor and respect you and your ideas.”
  • Put your phone away. I’ve already said more than enough about this.
  • Make space in the world for others. Share space! Take turns! Invite others to save time and steps, especially when it’s no inconvenience to you. Have a basketful in a grocery checkout line, and someone comes along behind you with one loaf of bread? Your delay by inviting them to go ahead will be unnoticeable. If they have to wait for you to check out, they’ll be delayed by several minutes or more. And they’ll be at least a little annoyed by your insensitivity.

If you want a pleasanter, more productive life, it goes without saying that you want better relationships. Here are some excellent ways to accomplish that.

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Week!

Eric Lofholm is my friend, mentor and sales coach. He hosts a 30-minute motivational call every Thursday (recently changed from daily).  The call is at 8:30 AM Pacific time. Register for it here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or later in a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

I challenge you to make a list of 100 or more ways you can send signals of respect to those you interact with. Let’s talk about that – it’s one of my favorite topics. Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Do You Know Someone Who’d Like This?

Forward it to them with the FORWARD feature in your email program. 

Did someone forward this to you? Would you like to subscribe (free)? Send me your email address and tell me you’d like to subscribe.

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you go to a networking event. You’re amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform gives you this kind of exposure to your market. These are the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value. We get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market.

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to remove clients’ pain.)

  • LinkedIn has 740 million members. We find the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people by yourself, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again!
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Newsletter Like This One?

Want new ways to engage your prospects and clients? Unity Copywriting writes the materials that help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

Kids Say The Darndest Things!

Those of you with a few years behind you may remember a show from a little over 20 years ago, hosted by Art Linkletter, titled Kids Say the Darndest Things.

And they do. 

In a teacher conference, Michael Thompson and his wife received a glowing report on their 6-year-old son Liam. They decided to pay more attention to Liam’s philosophical tidbits.

Read on for some examples.

Here’s the story. It follows a theme similar to the old Art Linkletter show.

Michael Thompson relates several examples of his son’s beautifully stated Liam-isms.

I won’t complicate the story with more of my musing. I’ll just suggest that you take to heart the simple wisdom of Liam Thompson. Your own young son or daughter probably has some unique insights as well. It may unclutter a beautifully simple idea or several. Paying attention can be instructive.

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Week!

Eric Lofholm is my friend, mentor and sales coach. He hosts a 15-minute motivational call every Thursday (recently changed from daily).  The call is at 7:45 AM Pacific time. Register for it here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or later in a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

Enjoy the simple wisdom of children? Check out Michael Thompson’s story. Want to talk about it? Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Get too Much Email?

Today’s issue is going to all my subscribers. If you’re among my monthly subscribers, you’ll receive your next issue on September 4, 2021.

If the monthly schedule suits you better, just reply to this message with the word “MONTHLY” in the message or subject line. If you elect that option, you can still check out the weekly issues at your convenience here. Since your last monthly issue, we’ve discussed:

Is That Guy Complaining? What’s Your Reaction? – Published 26 July 2021.

How Do You Start Your Day? – Published 19 July 2021

Are You Poisoning Your Brain? – Published 12 July 2021

 

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you go to a networking event. You’re amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform gives you this kind of exposure to your market. These are the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value. We get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market.

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to remove clients’ pain.)

  • LinkedIn has 740 million members. We find the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people by yourself, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again!
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Newsletter Like This One?

Want new ways to engage your prospects and clients? Unity Copywriting writes the materials that help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

Is That Guy Complaining? What’s Your Reaction?

Suppose you’re the agent on an airline ticket counter. 

A flight is delayed. It’ll cause some passengers to miss connections. Get ready! You know you’ll soon be faced with at least a few irate passengers. How to handle them?

HINT: Being defensive just to win the argument is probably not the best response!

Read on for some better ideas, and examples of how to apply them.

Ziglar – How to Have a Better Life

Several years ago, I connected with Sam Horn on LinkedIn. Recently I subscribed to her newsletter and received this tidbit. In it, I find great advice for how to get along in the world. Following it, you’ll find more joy in life. Your relationships will improve with those close to you and every casual encounter you have with a human. 

With a customer, your spouse, your child, or the waiter serving you in a restaurant, be conscious of how they feel. What do they want in their interaction with you? Honor those feelings and desires.

Sam’s advice is a wonderful application of Zig Ziglar’s principle in the pictured quote.

Remember this: Are you the direct or indirect cause of a situation that troubles you or someone else? It doesn’t matter – your reaction to it is your responsibility. When someone is inconvenienced by an occurrence and is railing at you, listen! No doubt the substance of their complaint has some merit. All the innuendo they attach to it may not.

Regardless of all that, hear them out. When they’ve vented, take Sam Horn’s AAA train:

  • Agree. The other person’s complaint is probably legitimate. Even if it isn’t, they’re sure it is.
  • Apologize. It doesn’t matter whether you have any cause in what they’re complaining about. It’ll get you on their side.
  • Act. Do whatever is available to you to make things as near right for them as possible.

Here’s a hallmark of the best public-facing companies (hotels, car rental agencies, airlines, etc.). The agents who work directly with customers have a carte blanche to do what’s necessary. To take the action to right a wrong for a customer. This has way more impact than fixing it after their complaint goes to a higher level in the company.

A slip-up that fails a customer’s needs can be a positive in the company’s image – IF it’s handled quickly and effectively. Leave it to fester and watch your Yelp ratings go south.

In this advice, there are some important DON’Ts, or NEVERs:  

  • NEVER raise your voice or show anger or annoyance. Stay calm!
  • NEVER defend your, or the company’s, role in the occurrence.
  • NEVER explain why it’s not your fault.

In every interaction, strive to find a way to defuse anger and help the other person get what they want. Print Zig Ziglar’s principle – “You will get all you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want.” – and post it in places where you’ll be reminded of it at critical times. As with any other habit, this may take a lot of effort at first. It can become second nature for you.

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Day!

Eric Lofholm is my friend, mentor and sales coach. He hosts a 15-minute motivational call every business day and a few holidays.  The call is at 7:45 AM Pacific time. Register for it here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or later in a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

How do you react in the face of someone’s complaint? Think Sam Horn’s suggestions might improve your life experience? Want to talk about it? Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Do You Know Someone Who’d Like This?

Forward it to them with the FORWARD feature in your email program. 

Did someone forward this to you? Would you like to subscribe (free)? Send me your email address and tell me you’d like to subscribe.

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you go to a networking event. You’re amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform gives you this kind of exposure to your market. These are the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value. We get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market.

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to remove clients’ pain.)

  • LinkedIn has 740 million members. We find the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people by yourself, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again!
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Newsletter Like This One?

Want new ways to engage your prospects and clients? Unity Copywriting writes the materials that help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

How Do You Start Your Day?

If you follow any self-help advice, you’ve surely found lots of suggestions for morning routines. How you start your day has a huge effect on how you feel for the entire day. And how productive you are. 

Ideally for most people, preparation for this morning began last night!

Much of what’s been said about morning routines would have you believe everyone should follow a fixed set of rules. I may have even been a little guilty of that myself.

As with most things in life, one size doesn’t fit all. Read on for some unique approaches to starting one’s day. Maybe one of them resonates with you. I think the most important thing is that you have a morning routine. Waking up wondering what you should do first seldom works out well.

Read on for some unique morning routines.

an image of lemon tea as way on how you start your day

Katie E. Lawrence owns Masterpieces in Progress and is studying Human Sciences at Auburn University. She’s identified six unique morning routines that fly in the face of conventional wisdom from many coaches.

Ed Catmull reads the news over breakfast. I do too, but my breakfast is after 2-3 hours of work and an exercise routine. In his case it’s first thing in the morning. Most coaches recommend no early morning input other than pure inspirational stuff. Apparently it works for him.

Oprah Winfrey spends much more time and energy on spiritual input than many. For her that’s extremely important and beneficial. I too find a spiritual connection very important, though I’m not religious, and have a little more varied approach to mornings.

Mark Cuban reads email as part of his jumping right into business when he wakes up. Very unusual, and again quite different from most recommendations. Works for him!

Mark Sisson reads and works crossword puzzles! Crossword puzzles and reading are very important for me too. I do most tf that sort of thing in the evening. Crossword puzzles are pure recreation for me, though I’m sure there’s some value in the mental exercise.

Most of these routines are quite different from what most coaches would prescribe as ideal. Perhaps one of these ideas resonates with you. Or perhaps you follow convention more. Whatever gives you an energy boost so you can start work with enthusiasm, intention and commitment is what you should do.

The only advice I’ve never heard of is to get up and wonder “What should I do first?”

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. Search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most of the articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Day!

My friend, mentor and sales coach, Eric Lofholm, hosts a 15-minute motivational call every business day and a few holidays. The call is at 7:45 AM Pacific time. Register for the call here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or later in a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

What’s your scheme for getting started in the morning? Conventional, or not so much? Want to talk about it? Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Do You Know Someone Who’d Like This?

Forward it to them with the FORWARD feature in your email program. 

Did someone forward this to you? Would you like to subscribe (free)? Send me your email address and tell me you’d like to subscribe.

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you went to a networking event and were amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform can give you this kind of exposure to your market – the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value and get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here.  

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market. 

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to eliminate clients’ pain.)

  • Search LinkedIn’s 740 million members for the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people manually, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again! 
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All of these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Newsletter Like This One?

Unity Copywriting can help you with newsletters or other materials to engage your prospects and clients. We help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

Should You Tell People About Your Goals?

This week we again visit Dr. Benjamin Hardy, discussing how to make your goals more compelling for you.

Tell people about them! Not to encourage their comments, but to inspire you to strive harder to achieve them.

In keeping with his advice, mine are listed in this article.

Should You Tell People About Your Goals?

Benjamin Hardy holds a Ph.D. in organizational psychology. He’s also the author of Personality Isn’t Permanent and several other books exploring personality evolution. He knows what he’s talking about!

Ben makes a strong case for advertising your goals to your network for your own encouragement. It’ll make their pursuit more compelling for you, since it’s human nature to want our actions to align with our words. 

Always remember that others’ opinions of your goals are unimportant to you. That is, unless they come from a coach whose help you’re seeking.

Recently, as I’ve become a little more forthcoming with my goals, I’ve shared some of them with people close to me. 

After listening to Ben Hardy’s exhortation, I believe sharing my goals with all of you could be life-changing for me. I beg your indulgence while I devote this issue to my own self-improvement.

Here are my goals. I read them aloud every night before I go to bed, and rewrite first thing every morning. (Actually, the fourth thing, after a cold shower, 20 oz. water for dehydration, and some wake-up stretches.) The point is I do this before starting the day’s business activities. 

You may find this list interesting, or not. Perhaps the list can offer you a useful pattern, if you haven’t been habitually listing your goals.

My guiding mission: 

To contribute positively to every transaction and relationship I participate in. 

My keystone goal (the one that enables most of the others): 

I earn/receive $20,000/+/month and, by the end of 2021, I accumulate 100 oz. gold/+, with ease. In my life, I accumulate net worth of $5MM/+ w/ease.

In addition, by the end of 2021:

  1. I establish a positive, loving relationship with my daughter Tara, with ease.
  2. I pay off CC debt, with ease.
  3. I write regularly for 3/+ clients, with ease.
  4. I weigh 190#/-, with ease.
  5. I play golf to a  handicap of 15/-, with ease.
  6. I support the LEC* HOA Board in reducing dues to $150/-/month, with ease.
  7. I entertain 1/+ groups of family and friends in LEC*, with ease.

LEC*: La Estancia de Cafayate. The lovely community in northwest Argentina where I make my home.

My 3-year vivid vision:

I’m debt-free!

I live comfortably in my own home, where I easily entertain my family and friends, including my visitors who come to check out my delightful life in Argentina.

When the mood strikes, I explore the local area in my truck. When I want to travel further, I fly to the destination I choose, often with family and friends.

My writing is more enjoyable than ever, since I’m fulfilling the needs of my clients and partners, who pay me well.

I invest a portion of my wealth in assets which offer me security against a financial collapse, additional income, and value to pass along to my heirs.

It’s my hope that this message inspires you to be more intentional about your goal setting and achievement efforts.

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here. You can search that page for keywords representing your particular interest. Most of the articles offer suggestions for ways of improving business and personal relationships. Keep in mind that business is done by…people. Every business concern is essentially an inter-personal concern. 

A “Shot in the Arm” Every Day!

My friend, mentor and sales coach, Eric Lofholm, hosts a 15-minute motivational call every business day and a few holidays. The call is at 7:45 AM Pacific time. Register for the call here. You’ll find instructions on how to join the call on Facebook, Zoom, by phone, or later in a recording. 

Let’s Talk!

Have you defined goals for your life and business? Are they written? Do you revisit them, write them and recite them every day? What do you think of Ben Hardy’s “future self” ideas? This is one of my favorite topics. Reply to this message or click here if you’d like to chat on the phone.

Do you like The Unity Community?

Do you find value in the articles?

What’s good about it?

What would make it even more valuable for you? 

Suggestions for topics in future issues? Do you have something you’d like to contribute? It can be your work…or someone else’s. I’ll give you and the author ample credit for your contribution if I use it.

Your thoughts, suggestions and comments are always welcome. Reply to this message, or go here if you’d like to chat on the phone or Zoom. 

Get too Much Email?

Today’s issue is going to all my subscribers. If you’re among my monthly subscribers, you’ll receive your next issue on August 2, 2021.

If the monthly schedule suits you better, just reply to this message with the word “MONTHLY” in the message or subject line. If you elect that option, you can still check out the weekly issues at your convenience here. Since your last monthly issue, we’ve discussed:

What’s the Best Investment You Can Make? – Published 28 June 2021.
Do Less To Accomplish More! – Published 21 June 2021
Vulnerability = The Greatest Courage! – Published 14 June 2021

Want to Do More Business?

Suppose you went to a networking event and were amazed to find all your ideal prospects waiting to talk with you.

Our Business Accelerator Platform can give you this kind of exposure to your market – the people you want to help!

We find your ideal client prospects and start conversations with them. Then we communicate your value and get them to schedule appointments with you…all on autopilot. This can happen for you! Learn how here.  

When you join Smart Money Network’s Business Accelerator Platform, we:

  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile Page so it better attracts people in your market. 

(Hint: What painful issue do you resolve for your clients? If your LinkedIn profile describes how you make your clients’ lives better, it’s rare! Most describe the merchant’s qualifications and expertise. They say little about what he/she does to eliminate clients’ pain.)

  • Search LinkedIn’s 740 million members for the few thousand who match your ideal client profile. You define your best prospect for us. Then we go find them.

(Even if you can find these people manually, it will take hours away from your work with your current clients.)

  • Invite about 100 of these best prospects every week to connect with you on LinkedIn.
  • Send a welcome message to those who accept your invitation and connect.

(Typically 15% or more. Currently, over 25% of those I invite are connecting!)

  • Deliver something of value to them from you, and then do it again! 
  • Begin a “drip campaign” of carefully timed messages, providing more value. These messages give…give… give…and then ask. No pitches!

All of these messages come from you personally. We want and expect your input in developing them…unless you want us to just do it. You can follow the threads and adjust your messages as you see better ways to engage your prospects. We’re always ready to talk with you about improving your messaging.

See a “hot” prospect you want to engage with your unique message? Take over the exchange manually!

Click here to learn how you can put this program to work for YOU!

Would You Like to Publish a Newsletter 

Like This One?

Unity Copywriting can help you with newsletters or other materials to engage your prospects and clients. We help you stay top of their minds.  Let’s discuss how these materials can help you with your marketing!

Do You Strive To Give Clients What They Want?

Again I found this week’s interesting content through my connection with my coach and mentor, Benjamin Hardy. Many of you will remember him from previous issues (examples here and here).

Benjamin Hardy holds a Ph.D. in organizational psychology. He’s also the author of Personality Isn’t Permanent and several other books exploring personality change. He knows what he’s talking about!

The guy whose work we actually focus on here is Steve Sims. Steve began life dirt poor in East London, the son of a bricklayer. At the age of 17, he began work as a bricklayer’s helper.

Michelangelo’s “David” by Elena Ruggeri on Unsplash

He quickly tired of carrying 80+ hods of bricks up a ladder, so he quit. He got himself to Hong Kong. As a doorman at a bar, he devised ways of making the bar experience exciting and exclusive for the right people, turning away the wrong people, especially those who were already drunk.


That was the beginning of Steve’s founding an elite concierge service, called The Bluefish. He specializes in smiles. His “secret sauce” has two main components:

  • Believe you can do it!
  • Give your clients what they want or need, and more. What they ask for is only a small hint to what they really want!

On this YouTube page, in Steve’s interview by Brendan Carr he tells of arranging a dinner at the Accademia d’Arte museum in Florence, Italy for a wealthy client.

What had the client asked for? A fancy dinner in an exclusive restaurant in Florence. Steve knew that restaurants in Florence aren’t really exclusive. so he contracted with this world-class museum to close and entertain the dinner, at the foot of Michaelangelo’s famous sculpture, “David”.

To top it off he convinced Andrea Bocelli to come in during the dinner and serenade the dinner party.

Many of his other signature events are described on The Bluefish website.

As the interview continues, Steve talks about passion, communication (including the unsocialmess of “social” media, a topic I focused on a couple of years ago).

One of Steve’s quips is “He’s low on IQ and high on I CAN.” Another suggestion is, when you start a conversation with someone who doesn’t know you, especially a powerful person, make it clear very quickly what’s in it for them.

Steve says at one point, in passing, “I consider myself an educated man. School has nothing to do with that.” Many people have focused on the low value of most organized education.

Steve talks about the value of relationships. He likens a relationship to an oak tree. When it’s young, it’s extremely vulnerable to damage. When it matures, it has the strength to weather all sorts of negative influences. Relationships are like that.

This is a rambling, incomplete introduction to a guy who’s deeply impressed me. If you go to his website, I think you’ll get infected with the guy’s brilliance, insights,and enthusiasm. Not to mention his complete political incorrectness!

Be A Leader, Not A Manager!

A leader doesn’t tell people what to do! Does that strike you as a contradiction? Read on.

In these letters, we’ve often examined aspects of what constitutes genuine leadership. Recently I listened to one of the best in-depth looks at this issue I’ve come across.

We’ll learn that the leader’s job is to provide the vision and why that vision is powerful, and what success looks like. Then he or she must get out of the way and let people do their jobs.

People may come back with questions. Of course, those questions must be answered. If they need support, emotionally or functionally, it’s the leader’s job is to provide that. The point though is that the leader doesn’t manage. The leader empowers people to do their work in a supportive environment.

Here’s Ben Hardy, one of my favorite sources for inspiration and great unique ideas, discussing truly great leadership. The idea of leading without managing is one of the cornerstones of modern leadership theory. Sadly, it gets more lip service than true adherence.

Useful background for what I’m about to offer can be found in my several-weeks-ago issue. There we discussed Ben Hardy/Dan Sullivan’s book, Who Not How. Ben refers to it often in today’s video.

Benjamin Hardy holds a Ph.D. in organizational psychology. He’s also the author of Personality Isn’t Permanent and several other books exploring personality change. He knows what he’s talking about!

The three things people need to do their jobs are:

  • Competence to do the work, and confidence in their competence.
  • Autonomy – the authority to apply their skills. They must be in control of how they do their jobs.
  • Connectedness – Being connected with team members is highly empowering.

One who takes any of this away is disempowering the worker and stripping them of the important elements they need to carry on effectively. The person guilty of this is trying to be a manager, and is not a leader. “Managing” people is an inefficient way of trying to get anything done. It usually results in the loss of the best talent, and the remaining people are unmotivated.

Ben discusses three stages of human development, a Robert Keegan model. I’ll briefly describe them here. He does a much better job of imparting a full understanding of them than I can do here in a few words,

  • Dependence – The socializing self – taking all sense of identity and direction from others.
  • Independence – Self-authorship – having one’s own goals and pursuing them without relationship with others. The only relationships an independent person engages in are those he or she believes will further his or her goals.
  • Self-transforming stage – two or more people share goals and solutions, neither imposing views on the other, but sharing views to result in the best solution they can see together – the team is better than the sum of the members.

In that third stage, mutual respect and trust are vital. If one party tries to dominate the goals, visions, and outcomes, the effort breaks down.

Be a leader! Don’t be a manager! Learn the psychology behind this here.